School Time Update 9/5/15

I've been dreaming of a few rearrangements in our home.

Correction: I've been dreaming of commandeering MisterKidd's large office for homeschool and offering him the smaller extra bedroom for an office. My 34 inch pupil and I have been feeling cramped whilst doing our studies recently, and how much room does a man really need to read books and prepare sermons? Is he doing vibrant interpretive dances to Itsy Bitsy Spider daily?

No.

I've had his blessing to make this switch for a while, but paint has not been a priority at budget-making time in the past few months. But last weekend, I managed to squeeze out a little of my birthday money for a gallon of Bistro White. On Monday afternoon, I rolled the first strip of paint on the wall.

Then I woke up, and it was Friday.

I had painted, heaved furniture, moved hundreds of books unstairs and down, and made countless trips to Lowe's throughout the week. Most of the work was done during nap time, in the evenings after MisterKidd came home, and at night after everyone was in bed. For most of the week, I was a zombie covered in Bistro White and La Fonda Blue, pausing only to hug my Littles who called "Mama!" from beyond the gate at the top of the stairs.

**This is where I would have put a picture of Kip holding a piece of cardboard with "LaFawnduh" written on it. Google it and laugh with me.

This morning, I put the finishing touches on the room, snapped a few pictures, then begged Big Girl to come and do some school work (which isn't hard). She is mildly impressed with the new arrangement, which is all I can ask of a two year old. I, however, am over the moon with it all. It is dreamy, and I find myself sneaking down there to just sit at my desk and look around, arrange the trays on her tot school shelves, and text another picture to my mom.

So, without any further rambling, here is our just-moved-into, freshly painted school room.

And some amazing and sturdy trays I found at the Dollar General for $1.

If you'd like to know where I got something or how I use it, I'd love to share! Enjoy!

The Rink

The small town MisterKidd and I grew up in had one form of entertainment, one venue that brought the kids of the community together and kept them off the streets. You know, Main Street gets busy around 5.

The last remaining sentiment from the 80's was a mediocre skating rink near the edge of town. It was run by the same person who opened it when it was "all the rage" in the decades before, Mr. Carl.

Oh, how the butterflies would swarm as my mom and dad dropped me off at the door of the orange-and-yellow-striped building with $5 for entry, skates, and a coke. The excitement of seeing my friends away from school, the way my flare leg jeans draped over my roller skates, and the thrill of zooming across the black-lit floor as Britney Spears played overhead was almost too much for a 10 year old on a Friday night. The only things that could cap that feeling were winning a slap bracelet in "musical skates" and holding hands with that bushy haired boy during the couples skate.

Cloud Nine. That's the only way to describe the feeling of my sweaty hand in his, maneuvering around the rink to Savage Garden on one of the last skates of the night. This beautiful boy in the KISS t-shirt was sweeping me off my feet as we dodged and weaved. There were other couples, but we were alone on the floor as we rounded each corner, hoping the song would play forever.

But alas, Mr. Carl would break our euphoria over the loudspeaker with these words: "All Skate, Everybody Skate, All Skate." With this, those who hadn't been blessed with a deep and lasting middle school romance were allowed to join us. After a few more loops, the lights were turned on, the music was turned off. We handed in our skates and were ushered into the night.

The Swing

MisterKidd and I have been together for a long time, by the world's standard. Although we've been married for less than 5 years, our journey started long before that, long before most people even know.

In the year two thousand, a bushy haired boy who was at least six inches shorter than me began walking with me on the way back from Gifted and Talented in the afternoons. I'm sure he was attracted by my ice green eyeshadow and the 12 butterfly clips I used to keep my bob in a ponytail. Who could resist?

I won't pretend to remember what we talked about. Probably Power Rangers and AR books and the like. He was the cool kid and the class clown, and he was largely considered to be the most eligible bachelor in the 4th grade (yes, you can be all of those things in a class of 40 kids). I was quiet and bookish with plenty of friends, but none of the male variety. Any boy who wasn't Leonardo DiCaprio was lame, that is until I was flashed a crooked smile by him. I was smitten.

After several of these walks, this boy began spending quite a bit of time with me on the playground. He invented a swing technique on my behalf called "the underdog." He stood in the back of the swings, pushing my friend and me back and forth, higher and higher until we were high enough that he could give one of us a good shove, running through the push and underneath us as we soared. It was pure bliss.

It was during one of these recess rituals that I received the greatest compliment to date. After performing several underdogs, this boy loudly and boldly proclaimed that I was much lighter than my friend, therefore easier to push. These words were music; never had I heard such sweet talk from a member of the opposite gender.

With this slightly backward comment, he had stolen my heart. His chivalrous manner of escorting me from GT and his commitment to me on the playground was enough for me to dedicate all of 5th grade to his happiness.

The Blog-iversary

This time last year, my plate was full. Not just "a small helping of each dish" full, but "a third trip to the buffet" full. We had a 19 month old and a newborn, and we were settling into our house after a crazy home buying experience. My brain needed a drain, an outlet for all of those thoughts, so I opened a Blogger account.

I wrote about 5 posts before I finally got the courage to publish them. Letting friends, family, acquaintances, and strangers into the mind of an introvert causes said introvert to, well, invert a little. After proofing each draft a million few times, sharing them with MisterKidd, and then proofing them once more, I finally clicked "publish" and sent some pieces of my heart onto the 'net.

On September 1st, I started this blogging experience. It's been a pretty fun way to get some things off my chest, share some things I'm learning about life (like this and this), and basically type out all of the things I tell my mom everyday on her drive home from work.

I recently read "Black Heels to Tractor Wheels," the love story of my culinary hero, The Pioneer Woman, and her husband. As I read, I was reminded of when MisterKidd and I began dating almost a decade ago when I could not even drive yet. All of those butterflies and first moments and band t-shirts that smelled like baseball practice came back as I read her story, and I thought, "how nice that she can go back and read this anytime he does any number of unspeakable things that husbands often do."

After reading this book, I've been tossing around the idea of typing up some of our adventures from the last nine years together. I jotted down some possible ideas and ended up with 53 type worthy anecdotes, give or take 10 more that I may remember along the way. I thought maybe, just maybe, our kids would be interested in why they have life and breath and existence someday, and we may not be around to tell them when that time comes.

So, as a service to our children, and so I can recall the feeling of riding down the backroads in a white Ford Ranger next to a scrawny jock listening to Switchfoot, and in celebration of my Blog-iversary, I will begin to chronicle the story of falling in love (and then out of love, then in again) with my main squeeze.

I hope to share one story each week, maybe more or less, depending on how many lemons I'm making into lemonade at the time. So get ready for a year (or more) of mundane teenage happenings, huge mistakes, moments of pure bliss, and the beginning of a life together.

Thank you to everyone who's been following along for the last year. I'm honored that you let me into your mind, even if it's only to pass the time waiting for the microwave to beep.

One Year

Today marks one year in our house. It's also Harry Potter's birthday. That says something, I think.

I've been reflecting a lot in the last few days about this time last year. Looking back, it just seems like a blur of **feelings. We were negotiating with the homeowners, going through the process of applying for a loan and a grant, packing up our things only to have the closing date moved (and then moved again), and then dealing with some unexpected problems with the house, all with a toddler and a newborn in tow.

But God, being rich in mercy and love and all of the good things for his children, had told us to go. I knew it the minute I walked into the house for the first time: this is my home. In the moment I stepped out of the rain and through the front door with my little family, God put in me the strongest urge to pursue this house. (Or maybe it was a strong urge to be out of the rain mixed with postpartum feelings. Who knows.)

We hadn't looked at any other houses. We weren't even "in the market." It was just a thing that we did one day. But when I crossed the threshold, I knew God's will for us as I had only a handful of other times in our marriage. This was the place where MisterKidd and I would raise our girls, build their character, and teach them as we walk by the way. I saw us painting and repairing and changing everything together as we weren't able to in our rental. I saw us on the back porch drinking coffee as our girls played in the yard.

This strong sense of God's will sustained me through the grueling home buying process. But I made the mistake of sharing it with MisterKidd, and he used it against me exactly one year ago yesterday, when I was ready to run away from my whole life and tried to talk him out buying the house. I'd like to say my faith never wavered, but it did there for a minute. I'm glad I had the other half of my soul to remind me of what I knew was true.

One year later, I am able to take the good, forgive the bad, and love my home as I knew I could on that first day. I am so thankful for all of the people who worked with us in that home buying season by helping us move, watching our girls, bringing us food, cleaning our rental, driving us to another town to buy a new fridge, ripping up old flooring and putting down new, painting an entire level in 36 hours, and sending love and well wishes and prayers on our behalf. I do not forget you as I think of this time.

This process was sanctifying, as is any endeavor of God's calling. I hope I look more like him on this side of it, one year later.

**To catch a glimpse of those feelings, read this angst-filled post, in which I was so bold as to compare my struggles with those of the Israelites.

Misconceptions About Debt, IMHO

In the last 100 years, the concept of buying on credit has become ingrained in the collective mind of our society. Most people can't fathom a world in which they save money to make purchases, or at least to make larger purchases. A year ago, I never would have dreamed it was possible to buy a car with cash or completely pay off a house (and we've done one of those in the last 3 months). An entire faction of our economy is based on the myth that it isn't possible to do so. I'm now prepared to challenge some of the misconceptions surrounding debt. 

***Disclaimer: I am not qualified to professionally advise anyone on their finances. These opinions are from my experience only.

"There is such a thing as 'good' debt."

This is based on the myth that you need "good credit" to succeed. The way I see it, the only benefit to maintaining good credit through debt is being able to acquire more debt. That doesn't sound "good" to me.

Imagine living off the credit bureaus' grid (no one can, but go with it). Nobody cares if you pay your bills on time, if you've ever defaulted on a loan, or if you have a college education that isn't paid for. Why? Because you walk in to make your purchase, and you have cash, so you own your thing that very day.

You can do this.

"...well, that's what credit cards are for." (referring to emergencies)

I overheard a woman on a cell phone say this in Target, and it made me cringe. Having a significant amount of money in a savings account, a tin can in your back yard, under your mattress, anywhere, will reduce or eliminate the need for using a credit card for emergencies. Each individual or family should have a savings of several months of expenses for WHEN you or your spouse gets pregnant unexpectedly (September 2013), your water heater goes out (last week), you have a car accident, or a myriad of other situations. Don't let an unexpected event put you into debt. Be your own credit card company. 

How? Create a zero-based budget and CRUNCH DOWN on your spending until the money has been saved. Or follow Dave Ramsey's Seven Baby Steps. Whatev. 

"But what if you're in Target and there's something on sale for $8.99, and it's usually $40 and it will look so cute in your house? Then what?"

This has been the hardest transition for me. I love a sweet deal on house junk probably more than the next person. It's in my job description to make my home comfortable, beautiful, and functional (see what I did there?). A bargain on something I needed or something I thought would solve a household problem was a major budget buster for me before I got serious about my finances. 

My sweet friend, who shares the same love for bargains on house junk, asked me this question, and it has been the hardest piece of advice I've had to give in my debt free journey so far:

You shouldn't buy it. 

If it's not in your budget--as in "there is no amount of dollars designated on your written budget for that month with 'on sale house junk at Target' beside it"--you cannot purchase the item. And if you are going hard after being debt free/saving for emergencies, there probably isn't. 

Nine dollars does not seem like a lot in the grand scheme of budgets and debt, but $9 every Target trip would ruin me. What's more important is the discipline it creates; learning to say no to yourself and those ugly impulses stabs a basilisk fang into the heart of our society with its "instant gratification" mentality. (Sorry for the nerd moment.) We are not children who need it now. We can wait.

"I bought it because I could afford it."

This is going to be hard and ugly, but I'm just going to say it: if you owe money to a creditor, then you can't afford it. You have already promised future money earned to the entity you borrowed money from. Until that debt is paid, you cannot "afford" (in the true sense of the word) anything. You're in the red. (Note: As a mortgage holder, this is my current state. We have an active and aggressive plan to get into the black as soon as possible.)

If you're a Christian, the scriptures (Proverbs 22:7, Romans 13:8, et al.) on debt should resonate with you, as I've mentioned in a previous post. Debt is not a new concept, although I would say it's more widespread than ever. It's also not an open handed issue if the Bible is your authority.  

Having the money in your hand and being able to "afford" something are very different things. The only person who knows exactly what she can afford is someone with a zero based budget. She knows exactly how much is coming in, all of her necessary expenses have been accounted for, and she has put money aside for the unexpected. 

When the money is in your hand and you do not have a zero based budget, dollars will slip through the cracks and necessary expenses will not even enter your mind when you grab that energy drink at the gas station for the 4th time this week or cruise through the drive thru because you need dinner. Plan ahead. 

I've personally had each of these mindsets (except for the credit card; we didn't even have that when emergencies came!). There was a season of getting ready for a new baby, wading through a sea of medical bills, paying a truck loan, and living paycheck to paycheck on two non-profit worker's salaries that still makes me want to curl up into a corner when I think back. But at least I had my $9 Target treat to keep me happy...

I learned that it doesn't have to be that way. You don't have to agree with me, but you should know that adopting this mentality about debt has changed everything about our family's finances, and many things about our marriage, for the better. And we are never going back. 

Planning Week Recap

Big Girl and I have returned to school time this week after another hiatus (man, I'm getting good at those). In my update a few weeks ago, I mentioned that I was taking last week off to plan for the Fall and promised to share the results.

It was a very productive week for me! I was able to accomplish some organization and decluttering projects around my house (imagine me in my pajamas at 11 pm, furiously scrubbing, painting, and rearranging my laundry room). Big Girl, on the other hand, was not a fan of the break. Sister loves her routine, and Mama not inviting her into the school room during Baby Sister's nap is not a part of that. Some mornings, she came out of her room asking for "sool time." I occasionally pulled a few things from the week before, but she didn't seem to mind that she'd seen them already!

Over the last couple of months, I have been jotting down ideas and thoughts for what we would be doing after Tot School Printables and some new things I want to incorporate. Considering the end of TSP is bittersweet; it's hard to believe our first home school season is coming to an end, but I'm so excited for the next part of our journey!

I didn't accomplish exactly what I thought I would, but I got a lot done nonetheless. So without further ado, here are 

3 Things I Accomplished During Planning Week:

1) I trimmed down my to-do list. 

I had some big, unrealistic lofty goals on my list as I began to plan last week. Part of what I accomplished was axing things off or moving them up. I had planned to prep through the end of Tot School Printables, but I ended up just prepping through "Rr is for Rainforest" because a) ink is expensive, b) our dinosaur printer is slow  3) I didn't want to plan too far ahead in case I think of an awesome activity for that theme the night before I start it, as I often do (ha). 

I had also intended to begin both a daily Bible time with both girls and a daily calendar time with Big Girl. I decided to begin only one now because of our strict budget and the fact that two new things could be overwhelming for all of us (Bible time won).

2) I nailed down exactly what we'll be doing after Tot School Printables. Almost.

As I said before, it's unbelievable that it's time to think about life after TSP with Big Girl. This has been such a wonderful season for both of us: she's getting the structure she craves plus one-on-one mom time, and I've had so much fun learning who she is as a student and who I am as a teachermom.

She's zooming through the materials I'm presenting now, so I can't wait to challenge her further in the next few months. Here's what I've got planned so far:

Reading--I'm going to make the leap and purchase our first curriculum. I've done a ton of research for a good pre-reading curriculum, and I've landed on All About Reading (which happens to be what Carisa from 1+1+1=1 uses). It also checks out with my SLP friend (Thanks Katie!). I considered just continuing to pull things together from what I find online, but as my degree is in Middle School education, I'm getting into "I'm not sure what to do next" territory, so I know I'll feel more comfortable with some guidance.

Letter Reinforcement--I want to continue doing letter focus with Big Girl, and there are tons of activities that I've found and put back for our preschool time. I like this Animal A-Z program (I promise I look outside of this blog, but it is just tailor-made for Big Girl!), but I'm still looking around for this one. Here's a really cute set of books that I'm considering purchasing if I do go this route.

Math--Oh, math. I am not a fan. MisterKidd will definitely take an even greater role in schooling our girls as this subject advances. However, it is important for life, so I will teach it! My math plans are similar to what I'm working on now: number recognition, writing numbers, one-to-one counting, and patterns. I will just continue to vary the activities I present and possibly add a "number of the week" focus. We will also be doing calendar time, which will add tons of number exposure.

Theme--This might be my favorite aspect of school time right now. I love incorporating the theme into our lives outside of the school room, decorating the school room in the theme, buying pulling toys we already have that go along with it, and reading books with Big Girl about that subject. I will definitely continue this after TSP.

The themes are built into TSP (last week was Oo is for ostrich, and the theme was African animals), so I had to develop my own method for choosing a weekly theme. I've decided to choose a book to focus on each week and build a theme around it. This will consist of all the ways I've been incorporating the theme, plus a few new ones: reading the book daily with Big Girl, doing craft/reinforcement activities throughout the week, and exploring the world inside the story with props. I'll expand on this as I get more plans on place.

Tot Trays--This Montessori-inspired method of presenting the work to Big Girl has been so successful, so it will be sticking around a little longer. It makes planning easier for me, she's able to see what's available to her, and I can see at a glance what we've already accomplished in a session without having to check my planner. Stick with what works, y'all.

3) I realized (again) the beauty of homeschool.

I am the teacher, and I have no authority (outside of God and my hot principal). I have two students. I have no deadlines, no pacing guides, and no standards to meet. Sometimes this is difficult, sometimes I'd like some structure, sometimes it's daunting, but most of the time, it's beautiful.

I didn't get all of my planning done last week. In fact, I'm planning right now at my favorite sushi place. 

But that's ok. I'm developing a complete, 16 year IEP for each of my children, and that's going to take some time.